So first off, HAPPY HALLOWEEN everyone! I hope you have a safe and fun day trick or treating! I just love Halloween so much b/c of all the little cute kids that come trick or treating! They are so darling!
"You can't live your life for other people. You've got to do what's right for you, even if it hurts some people you love."
- Nicholas Sparks
If you have never read any of his books, I highly recommend them!
I came across this quote last night and it really struck a cord with me. I have been going through some major stuff and yes, its hard to deal with but I just need to worry about me and me only. So, there is this guy whom will remain nameless. I wandered upon this guy again (we went to high school together) on FB the other day. Well, low and behold his is friends with my BFF and I have been messaging back and forth over FB about this guy. I mean, I really, really like him, but just don't want to put myself out there. Again, really hard to do things I want. So, I have been talking to her about him, as well as, another girlfriend and they have encouraged me to just go for it. As Steph said, you will never know how it will turn out unless you don't try. She told me to try, b/c I never know where it may lead, which hit home and this quote sums it all up for me! I have to go for it and suppose sometimes you have to write your own destiny!
I mean, I am so tired of being all alone and feel that my time may never come. Maybe I am meant to be alone? Right? Or this is at least what has been going through my mind lately. I think this guy could really be great and he seems pretty great and even if it just ends in friendship, that will be great as well. Oh and he a daughter, which kind of freaks me out. I mean, yes, I LOVE kids and want them more than anything in the world, but being around one and it not being your child and the mom being in the picture (whom I also know and went to high school with) it really, really freaking me out.
So, pray for me and keep me in your thoughts in the next few weeks that I muster up enough courage to go for what I want and put myself out there. I live by the motto - You have to put yourself out there and do daring things, otherwise, life is boring!
In other news, I am seriously considering and contemplating weight loss surgery - specifically the Lap Band. I have tried various diets and exercise and NOTHING has worked. I need to get this extra weight off and learn to manage it better and as dieting along and exercise (I mean, I was on a strict 5 day a week exercise program of lots of cardio and weights) and lost a few pounds and then it stopped. SO, just pray that I make the right decision, as this is a life altering decision!
As always, much love!
- Jenn
xoxo
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