Learning To Love My Life

I am steadily learning to love my life, the one God gave me, the life that he allows me to take another breath each and everyday. I am trying to learn to take nothing for granted and live life to the fullest the best way I know how. I have a pretty amazing life. I have a stable job, dependable car, sufficient money for the things I need, great health and a very loving family, especially very loving, kind and caring parents. I am now nearing 27 years old and when I look back I have A LOT of things to be proud of. I am the first person in my immediate family to graduate from high school with a diploma and then go on to college. Some awful things have happened over the past 2 years but God doesn't promise everyday will be great. There will be bad times and good times. There will be trials and tribulations. I am learning to not let things get to me and to just go with it and not worry. It stresses me out and then it makes me a very un-likable person. 

Oh sometimes I wish I had a better job, better car, a home of my own but I am still making my way and I am working toward financial freedom and getting myself out of debt. I want to be able to make informed decisions and informed purchases and cut up all unnecessary credit cards. Those things can become way out of control way too quickly. I need to be financially stable enough so that when I want to make my first home/land purchase I can do so knowing that I am not having to borrow money to do so. I want to pay of my medical bills from my surgery last year and also pay off a few other debts I have from a previous medical emergency.

I have 3 amazing children in the form of miniature dachshunds and they want nothing but my love which they get plenty of and even on my worst day they can make me feel the best I have ever felt. I know that things are working out just how God has planned and I sometimes am too impatient to wait for his timing. I need to just work more towards letting his will be done and let his timing be done and not worry or stress about when I will meet "Mr. Right" or when I will have my first child or when I will purchase my first home, etc. Things will work out just as planned and there is nothing I can do to change that. 

I have also finally found my inspiration again with digital scrapping and documenting my memories, events and photos again. I had lost all my mojo there for a while but have finally gotten it back. I can say it is nice to know that there are people who actually love your work and want you to create things for them. I'm not expert but I love this form of art and expressing myself through it this way. So you may see a few of my scrap pages posted here soon, as soon as I can get them all gathered and posted. 

Until then, I leave you with this thought - What have you done today to make someone else's day? Just a simple smile can save one person and let them know they matter. Be kind for we know not what battles others are battling for each is different. Ask someone how they are and listen to them, you just might save them. 

Love Always

- Jenn

Journey to Motherhood?

As I sit here & lull over my thoughts from the past oh 6 months to a year, would you like to know what topic filled those thoughts the most? You got it - Becoming a mother! I see all of the beautiful babies & all my friends having babies & pregnant bellies & that desire deep in my heart, just breaks free & there it goes! I know that yes, # 1 - I have no significant other, which I think is needed for this journey! # 2 - Even though that is my deepest desire to become a mother and has been for the past 6 months to a year, the thought of becoming a mother actually scares the crap out of me at the same time.  I am 24 and I can already hear my biological clock ticking.  And most of this thinking I will never, ever become a mother has come from my mother's journey to her having her hysterectomy in July.  After her surgery, her excellent OB/GYN informed her that she had one of the worst cased of endometriosis that he has ever seen and I'm telling you, it was not a pretty site from the pictures!  Knowing this, I am so scared that I will have endometriosis which will make my journey to motherhood that much more difficult, but I have turned this all over and laid it in God's hands and pray about it everyday and know that when the timing is right, I will be blessed beyond measure and only when he sees fit.    

I finally, after much time broke my cycle of depression with lots of help and prayer and am now free to be happy & I deserve to be happy and though I struggle daily with a certain situation that keeps coming back, I know that this happens for a reason and I just move along and deal the best way I can.  

For this I refer to the these 2 verses from the Bible - 

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your Heart 

Psalms 37:4

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope & a future.  

Jeremiah 29:11

So when all else fails, pray and in return you will receive the desires of your heart, in due time!

And on that glorious day when I first look into my child's eyes, I will be able to say "I was Enchanted to Meet You"

So this is me, being happy  --

Lots of love

- Jenn

25 Days of CHRISTmas!

Hello dear readers, if you're out there.  Again, it has been a while since my last post.  You may want to know what I have been up to.  I have to say, a whole lot of nothing, but busy all the same.  Thanksgiving just passed and what a great Thanksgiving it was.  I was surrounded by my loving family and friends, so I couldn't have asked for a better one.  Although, I has a rather nasty illness, coughing a lot, chest and sinus congestion, sore throat, runny nose.  You name it, I had it, which made for quite a poor Jennifer over the holiday.  But now, I am starting to get back to my normal self.  Still coughing up a storm, so I may have to make a visit to the ole doctor soon, which I am dreading.  

I am rather excited that CHRISTmas is upon us.  I plan on doing a 25 Days of CHRISTmas for things that I am thankful for and blessed with each day until CHRISTmas.  So, look forward to that.  Today, we had a slight mixture of snow and rain, which was kind of yucky and I can go outside that much, being sick and not wanting to make it worse.  I really love the snow, but hate the cold!  I know, makes perfect sense, right? Haha!  Christmas has always been a special time to me, I have been a very lucky girl and my parents have always, always made Christmas special, whether they had the money to do so or not.  As I get older, I find that the little things are the ones that mean the most and I appreciate them more now.  So, I hope you all have wonderful and blessed days leading to Christmas and remember Jesus is the reason for the season.  I read something today that sparked something rather neat -- There has been only one Christmas, the rest are anniversary's of our Saviors birth!  

Tonight, I am sitting here looking at our White Christmas Tree in awe, as it is one of my favorites things to do.  Just sit and watch the lights twinkle is so amazing and breathtaking.  The bright multicolored lights are just so beautiful! 

I hope you all are well and enjoying life!  What else can we do, we never make it out alive anyways.  Live life to the fullest and do things that are crazy and spontaneous, because one day you may never have the chance and never regret anything it makes us who we are and so long as we learn from our mistakes, that is all that matter!  Who cares what others think, our own opinion is the only one that matters.  Don't lead a boring life, take it by the horns and saddle up and sit back for the ride.  

Much Love,

- Jenn

God Gave Me You

Well, today is Wednesday, August 24, 2011 and it has been a while since I last posted  -- 

Today I had my annual eye examination, which I dislike highly with a passion!  Though, I love getting new glasses, which I did today!  I LOVE them!  I thought about getting contacts, but it has been quite a while, probably oh say, 3 years since I last put a contact in my eye and the thought of retraining myself to use them did not appeal to me! But all in all, my exam went great, not much change in my prescription, so it has not worsened, which is a good thing, for me!  I have an Astigmatism, which stinks and makes my letters / numbers all wonky when I don't have glasses because my eye is not shaped like the natural eye should be.  Which will make my sight, a lot harder as I age.  

Also, I have really been struggling with moving through life and had been in quite a depression for a few months, but things are better now and things are looking up.  I just have to come back to my Faith in God and know that he is in control and will lead me where I need to be.  I am handing over control to him.  

The depression had gotten so bad, not that I wanted to harm myself in anyway, just being down in the pits, moving along as if nothing was happening.  I was stuck and the world and everyone around me was going somewhere and I was stuck in a rut.  

But, I got a new car (which I swore I wouldn't do, for quite some time after paying my other one off), that lasted for a whole SIX months.  I so did not want another car payment, until I had a full-time job, but the car I bought was too good of a deal to pass on.  I am the proud new owner of a 2004 White BMW X3 SUV and I love, love it!  I needed a SUV badly, but am not looking forwards to those payments for the next 2 years.  So, along with that, I am stressed about needing a full-time job, just to help me manage my new car payment / bills better.  I am having to have strict control over how I manage my money and account for everything, when I wasn't anymore since paying the other car off.  

So, I applied for a couple of jobs at another local hospital and am hoping and praying that I get one of those full-time positions, as I need one badly.  So, if you are the praying type, please keep me in your thoughts and prayers, I would greatly appreciate it! 

Also, I know God is making changes in my life and I am finally seeing these changes.  I was looking for something in particular in all the WRONG places and now, I have something that I think will be great.  I am not going to get into it too much, as it is all new and I will keep ya posted.  

I have fell in love with a new song by Blake Shelton - God Gave Me You ...God Gave Me You - Blake Shelton ... Have a listen and I hope it touches you, like it has me.  

I love this verse and keep it posted everywhere on little sticky notes to remind myself of the greatness around me ....

God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
For when I think I’ve lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you

Enough from me!  I hope you all enjoy my randomness and feel free to leave me comments!

xoxo - Jenn

To every [thing there is] a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

Again, I have been ever so neglectful to my dear blog.

I am sitting here looking out the window and the beauty around me amazes me.  This verse has been in my thoughts here lately and I love, love it!  Though it almost Summer, it is currently 55 degrees here and windy, which makes it so cold!  I went out to walk and check the mail and had to wear a coat!  Seriously!  

How's my life you may ask?  Well, let me just tell you -- Things are great!  I was in a really depressed phased for about the last three months and now, things are much better.  I have lots of things going on and I am making some "big girl" decisions and I would greatly appreciate it, if you would keep me in your thoughts and prayers.  

Mother's Day was a couple of weekends ago and I just have to say, I am sooo Thankful for my mother!  I love her beyond measure and though sometimes, I think I take her for granted.  She has always been there for me and never had judgment on the things I do and is always encouraging me in everything I do.  I worry about her sometimes as daughters do.  I am so blessed that God sent her to me!  We are mother and daughter, but above all we are truly FRIENDS. 

I am making a roast for dinner and it smells every so good and I am starving.  Should you want the recipe, I am in a sharing mood -- So here ya go --

- One roast, cut of your liking (I prefer butt roast or shoulder)

- One bag of carrots (or fresh from the garden)

- About half a bag of Red potatoes (or fresh from the garden)

- Two bags of frozen Pearl Onions

- 1 liter Dr. Pepper

- Seasoning Salt

- Beef Bouillon Cubes

- Salt and Pepper

- Water

Directions:    I use my electric roaster and combine all ingredients.  First, put in the roast meat, sprinkle with seasoning salt and pour over the Dr. Pepper.  Next, add all vegetables (carrots, potatoes and onions).  Add 1 beef bouillon cube, per 1 cup of water you add to cover the meat and veggies. Lastly, add salt and pepper to your liking and roast for about 2 to 3 hours or until your liking.  

Hope you all are having a great day and Enjoy!  

Sincerely,

- Jenn

Neglect ....

So readers, I have neglected you all!  It has been since New Year's since I last posted.  I have been dealing with life and the such.  With that being said ...

Spring is upon us here in the South after months of WINTER that I thought would never be over.  I sit back and look at all the beauty around me and it takes my breath away.  As I post this, I am sitting on my back deck at the patio table with the sun shining and the wind blowing at a wonderful 79 degrees!  I woke up early this morning and came to sit on the deck and haven't been back in the house since.  The South sees some of the beautifulest Springs and I anxiously wait every Winter, counting down the days till it is warm enough to curl up with a good book in the swing.  

My mother and I are taking a mother / daughter trip to the 2010 Vera Bradley Outlet Sale in Fort Wayne, Indiana in the next week - April 11 - 16 and we are beyond ourselves with excitement.  We plan on shopping our hearts out and visiting the Windy City of Chicago and a few other stops along the way.  Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we make the 9 hour drive up.  

I am starting a new project of some sort in the next month or so, so stay tuned for it. 

Thanks for stopping by!

- XoXo

- Jenn -

Happy New Year - 2011

Hello dear readers,  I hope you all are having a splendid start to you new year.  So, what resolutions have you made for the new year?  Me - Start Living is my main goal for 2011. Next, would be to actually  finally finish my college degree.  I feel that this year will be better than ever!  I hope you all had a great New Year's day and spent it with the people you love!  

I have not much to say today, just wanting to wish you all a very HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! 

All my love,

- Jenn